Into the West
by evelynne
Summary: The war is over. Finally. But while most are celebrating, the Boy Who Lived is not. This is a shortened story about the weeks after Vldemort's downfall. I will be writing a longer version of this story later. Warning: contains slash!


_Lay Down  
Your sweet and weary head  
Night is Falling  
You've come to journey's end_

72 hours ago, Harry Potter had still been living a normal life, at least, normal for life during a war. He had been happy with Ginny at his side, with Ron and Hermione laughing instead of bickering, for once. He had just recently asked Ginny if she would marry him; he loved her dearly and Ron had given his approval the night before Christmas. He hadn't known that _this_ was going to happen.

He knew the last and final battle was coming; everyone did. He just hadn't expected it to end like it had. Ginny had died, taking the curse meant for him so that he would still have a chance. Ron and Hermione had both attacked Voldemort in hopes of giving Harry a chance when he was down, and now they were in the hospital with serious injuries that may yet turn out to be fatal.

It never ended like this in the stories. In the stories, the hero won and his love lived, along with his friends. In the books, the price of victory was small and there was always much rejoycing afterwards.

But for him, there was only grief.

_Sleep now  
And dream of the ones who came before  
They are calling  
From across the distant shore_

Now, all Harry could do was remember. That was all there was left for him, bittersweet memories of his time spent with his friends and with his love. Oh, his friends were still alive, but for how long? Harry crawled into his bed at Order Headquarters and lay there, remembering.

He remembered all of the good times he had with Ron and Hermione, from when they first met on the train all the way through to this past Christmas. Maybe the last Christmas they would ever have together, and the last one with Ginny, although they hadn't known it at the time.

_It was a cold December morning, Christmas morning. Harry stepped off the last stair and was tackled by Ginny. _

"_There you are sleepyhead! Come on!" she kissed him and dragged him over towards the giant tree. Letting go of him, she reached under the tree and pulled up a box. Blushing slighty, she handed it to him, urging him to open it. He did, and found all manner of quidditch related stuff inside. Setting the box down, he swept up Ginny in a hug and spun her around. Laughing, she kissed him as soon as they stopped moving. _

_A noise behind them broke them apart, until they saw that it was only Ron and Hermione. _

_The day passed quickly, full of laughter and warmth. Throughout the day though, Harry had noticed that Ginny was becoming distant. It was probably his fault; he hadn't given her his present yet. _

_At the end of the day, as the four were sitting in the common room alone, chatting idly, Harry decided that it was now or never. Everyone else from Gryffindor was off on vacation, and there wouldn't be another time like this, with the four of them comfortably alone. Reaching into his pocket, he pulled out a small box covered in red velvet. Sliding off the couch to kneel on the floor in front of Ginny, he faced her and opened the box, showing her what lay inside._

"_Ginny, will you marry me?" _

_He watched her expression closely as it changed from shock to pleasure to something else. After a minute of silence, he asked again. _

"_Ginerva Weasley, will you marry me? Please?" he whispered. "I love you." _

_Ginny smiled and said "Harry James Potter, you are the craziest man I have ever met. Of course I will marry you. I love you too." And she kissed him. _

A single tear escaped from his eye and Harry Potter blinked, trying hard not to cry again.

_Why do you weep?  
What are these tears upon your face?  
Soon you will see  
All of yours fears will pass away  
Safe in my arms  
You're only sleeping_

Burying his head in the pillow, he tried not to remember, but visions of the last battle flashed through his mind like sheet lightning, threatening to rip him open and tear him to pieces.

_Then, three days after Christmas, the war had come to Hogwarts. Voldemort had come at last to kill Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived. The D.A. had put up a wonderful fight, although Harry had only heard about that later. He, Hermione, Ron and Ginny had gone out to meet the Dark Lord. _

_Harry didn't know how long he had fought against Voldemort, but eventually, he wearied, and there had been quite a few close misses. Dodging behind a statue, he took a deep breath, trying to regain some strength. He heard Voldemort's cruel laughter behind him as he rested._

"_So you think you can hide from me, do you?" Harry knew that he was supposed to answer, but he didn't. "You don't honestly think you can defeat me, Harry Potter? You are weak." They had been through this before, Voldemort taunting him, trying to get him to come out into the open. Another breath and he whirled out from behind the statue, shouting a curse as he went and dropping into a roll immeadiately. More of that creul laughter as his spell was blocked. _

"_Crucio!" Voldemort spat very suddenly, and Harry's mind went blank with pain. He gasped as the curse was lifted and turned to face his opponent. Voldemort watched him with contempt and hatered, his red eyes glowing with the intensity of the feelings and his slit of a nose flaring. "Now, prepare to die!" Voldemort said smoothly, his voice full of bitter mirth. He raised his wand in preperation and Harry pointed his own wand at his enemy and screamed "Avada Kedava!" before Voldemort could do more than blink. A blast of green light hit Voldemort squarely in the chest and he fell. _

_It should have ended there. That should have been enough. But it wasn't. Harry stood and made his way slowly over towards his fallen opponent. He stopped about a foot away from the fallen body, watching it with his wand still raised, making sure that the creature was dead. Next thing he knew, he was on the ground, writhing in pain. Small lacerations formed everywhere on his body and he screamed. _

_When the pain finally faded away, Harry slowly raised his eyes to look at Voldemort. This was the end, Harry knew it. There was no chance that he could win, he couldn't even move from the pain. Voldemort laughed again, a high-pitched, cold sound that turned Harry's blood to ice. He raised his wand even as he laughed, and pointed it at Harry. "Your parents died begging for their lives, Harry, why aren't you begging for yours? Is it because you know how hopeless it is? Have you finally given up? Pity, I would have loved to see you beg." He jeered. He whispered the killing curse in an almost gental manner, and a flash of green light shot towards Harry as he lay helpless on the ground. A flash of color intercepted the curse, and Harry felt a body thump lifelessly to the ground. Not daring to look, Harry gingerly sat up, and mentally scanned himself for serious injuries, since he finally had a moment. He found none._

_Before he could raise his wand, or even stand, two figures were standing between him and the Dark Lord. Eyes going wide in shock, Harry saw that it was Ron and Hermione standing between them. He screamed as Voldemort carelessly disposed of them with a few words and turned his attention back to Harry. Harry pointed his wand at Voldemort and was about to let fly a curse when he felt someone beside him. Glacing over at the person, he was shocked to find Draco Malfoy standing there. Looking back towards Voldemort, he noticed that he had lowered his wand. "That's right Draco, finish off Potter for me. You will be greatly rewarded." He said with a laugh. _

_Harry turned back to Malfoy and raised his wand. And paused as Draco began whispering instructions under his breath. "Look Potter, I'm on your side here, you're going to have to trust me if you want to win this war." Harry nodded almost imperceptibly. "On the count of three, we're going to round on Voldy over there and kill him together, okay?" _

_Harry whispered back, "Okay." _

"_Oh and Potter?"_

"_Yes?"_

"_Put as much of your anger and your hatred and magic strength behind it as you can. Oh yes, I do believe that Voldy over there is planning to rape your Ginny when he's done with you, if you wanted to know." Harry seethed at the comment. "Ready? One, two, three!"_

_They both turned towards Voldemort at the same moment, shouted "Avada Kedava!" simultaniously and watched together as Voldemort's eyes tried to widen in shock before he fell to the ground, howling in pain. The battle being waged around them came to a standstill and everyone watched together as Voldemort's body crumpled in upon itself and burst into green flame. As the flames died, so did the shrieks and everyone stood staring for a moment longer before the battlefield broke out into chaos. Death Eaters fled the field and Order members chased them, while the D.A. came and gathered around Harry and Draco. _

_It was then that Harry dared to look at the bodies of his two best friends on the ground. They were still alive, for which he was grateful, and he immeadiately gave orders for them to be carried up to the infirmary. As they were being carried away, his eyes fell on a shock of red hair. His breath caught, and he broke away from D.A. memebers, leaving them staring as he rushed over to the fallen body. Turning it gently over, he saw that it was Ginny and forgot to breathe. He shoved his fingers at her neck, but couldn't find a pulse . . ._

_He screamed, in pain and horror and sadness. He screamed and screamed and clutched her dead body to him, refusing to let go, even as his tears fell down into her hair. His scream could only be described as an unearthly wail, and everyone who heard cried for him, even if they didn't know who they were crying for or why. _

Tears were creating a wet spot on the pillow where Harry's face was, but he didn't care. He was alone now, completely and utterly alone. He cried the silent tears of a broken heart and wished that he had died as well.

Something compelled him to look up from the pillow. At first he saw nothing, then there was something impossible filling up his vision. Through his tears, he thought he saw Ginny crossing the room and sitting on the bed next to him, pulling his head gently into her lap and comforting him, although he knew she was dead. Despite that knowledge, he relaxed, his fear of being alone fading as sleep closed over him like a dark and welcome friend. He felt safe.

_What can you see  
On the horizon?  
Why do the white gulls call?  
Across the sea  
A pale moon rises  
The ships have come  
To carry you home  
And all will turn  
To silver glass  
A light on the water  
All souls pass_

An hour or so later, Harry awoke to find himself alone. At first, he couldn't remember anything, but then it all came crashing back like a tidal wave of darkness. Ginny was dead, Ron and Hermione probably dying and . . .

And what about Malfoy? The one who had unexpectedly helped him to defeat Voldemort, when he had been sure that Malfoy was there to kill him. _I suppose I should go find him and thank him for helping me. I wonder if he lost anyone close to him . . . I wonder if he even has enough heart to care about someone besides himself?_ Harry sat up and swung his bare feet over the side of the bed. He hissed as his feet met cold air, but a moment later he was pulling on socks and a sweatshirt to ward off the cold air. He began walking towards the door with every intention of going to find Malfoy when a wave of grief washed over him. He stepped backwards and sat down hard on the bed.

How was he ever going to find love again? Ginny was . . . had been . . . the love of his life. No, he still loved her, but she was dead. He still couldn't believe it. He thought back to the moment he realized she was dead. The memory was painful and it broke his heart again, but he realized something as well. While he had been holding her dead body and crying, someone had been standing with him, comforting him, although he hadn't really noticed at the time.

Now he wondered who it was that had been comforting him.

_Hope fades  
Into the world of night  
Through shadows falling  
Out of memory and time_

Harry sat there thinking for over an hour. His thoughts roamed everywhere, but at the end of that hour, his thoughts had turned dark and depressing. He wondered if there was any point to living if everyone he cared for was dead. What had been the point of defeating Voldemort when the cost was the lives of people he loved. It wasn't just Ginny who had died. Luna was dead, Neville was as well. Seamus would never try to turn water to rum again, as he was now dead as well. Charlie Weasley, Angelina Johnson, Fleur Delacour, Colin Creevy and his brother, and many others were also counted among the dead.

The Order had lost who knows how many . . . he hoped for a brief moment that Lupin and Tonks were still alive, but his hope faded faster than lightning flashes. His mind swirled farther into a world of shadows and darkness the more he thought about all of the deaths. In his current state of mind, he never even thought of how much worse it would have been if Voldemort had won. Actually, he thought that maybe it should have ended that way; at least he'd be dead instead of sitting here feeling miserable.

He lay down on his bed and pulled the covers up to his chin. He decided that he wasn't going to get up again, unless someone could tell him way he should continue to live while all his friends are dead. He had unconciously started counting Ron and Hermione among the dead a while ago, even though he still tried to think of them as alive and well.

Harry's hope of a happy life without Voldemort was gone, and he sank into a deep depression, from which he didn't believe he'd survive.

_Don't say  
We have come now to the end  
White shores are calling  
You and I will meet again  
You will be here in my arms  
Just sleeping_

Harry slept again, and his dreams were haunted by thoughts of his friends and memories of the battle. He woke up for a moment and again was convinced that Ginny was there with him. He slept peacefully after that moment, although he did't remember it when he woke up again.

For the next week, Harry walked around in a daze. His depression was overwhelming at times, and other times he felt almost normal. He kept expecting to see Ginny walk around the corner, or to find his friends fighting over something stupid when he walked into the next room. It always dissapointed him to find that they weren't there, and it was at those times that the pain was almost unbearable.

After a while, he stopped expecting to see his friends around every corner. Eventually, he managed to finally wander into the kitchen, instead of letting Dobby bring him his meals. As he entered the room, he was surprised to see Draco Malfoy sitting at the kitchen table, looking ruffled and worn out. His usually immaculate appearance was skewed, his hair wasn't slicked back and was rather messy, like Harry's own hair, and his clothes were rumpled and looked slept in.

The other boy didn't even bother to look up as Harry entered the room, just muttered a hello. Harry mumbled the same back as he went around gathering food. He ended up putting most of the things he grabbed back, so by the time he finally sat down at the table, he only had a muffin and a mug of hot cocoa laced with some Butterbeer.

He ate slowly, trying not to think at all. He could feel Malfoy watching him, which was a bit unnerving. As he finished the last sip of his hot cocoa, Malfoy came over and sat next to him. Harry looked at the other boy cautiously, trying in vain to read his intentions. It was a while before anything was said, when Malfoy asked Harry if he was going to be alright.

"I don't know. Why do you care?" was Harry's tight response.

"I don't think that I do care, but you look like death." Malfoy responded, managing a half-hearted smirk. Harry stared at his one-time enemy for a moment before asking "Are _you_ going to be ok?"

"I doubt it."

"Did you loose someone too?" Malfoy nodded and looked away. Harry suspected that he was fighting back tears. Strange, he would have never thought of Malfoy as a person who would cry over anything. "Who was it?"

"Luna. We were going to tell everyone as soon as school started up again, but . . ." his voice trailed off and his breath hitched.

"You mean Luna Lovegood, as in the crazy Ravenclaw girl?" Malfoy nodded. "I would have never guessed . . . I'm sorry."

"Don't be, it wasn't your fault. Besides, you lost someone too."

_What can you see  
On the horizon?  
Why do the white gulls call?  
Across the sea  
A pale moon rises  
The ships have come  
To carry you home_

A few days after his conversation with Malfoy, who he was now calling Draco in his mind, Harry was hiding in the library, trying to concentrate on the book he held and failing miserably. The pain of his loss was still sharp, but not as bad as it had been. He had finally accepted the fact that he would never see her again, never kiss her again, never hear her lovely voice again. He was trying to pull himself out of his depression and start living again, but it was hard.

He thought back to the conversation when he had thought for a moment that maybe Draco actually cared about him. As he thought more and more about Draco's attitude towards him during those minutes, the more he became convinced that the other teen did care and maybe there was a chance of them becoming friends. A few more moments of reflection, and it clicked. Draco Malfoy had been the one comforting him and crying with him on the battlefield that day. Now he absolutely _had_ to go thank him. he took a mental note of the page number before closing the book and setting it down on the table. Getting up, he padded out of the library, not bothering to extinguish the lights.

He looked all over the house for the other teen until he found him hiding in one of the guest bedrooms. Knocking on the door, he let himself in. "Malfoy? Draco?" _Did I just call him 'Draco' out loud? _"Can I talk to you?"

"Did you just call me Draco, Potter?" _Merlin, he noticed._

"Yes I did."

"Come in Harry. And close the door, will you?" Harry stepped further into the room and slid the door shut quietly. "What do you want?"

"I wanted to thank you for helping me . . ." Harry began quietly, nervous about thanking his one-time enemy for anything.

"You actually thought that I was doing that to help you? I did that to help myself!" Draco retorted.

"Fine, if you're going to be that way about it, I'll just leave!" Harry snapped. He turned on his heel and was about to open the door when he was stopped by a hand on his shoulder.

"Don't leave, I was only joking." Malfoy said softly. He actually sounded sincere. Harry wondered if he was imagining things. Turning around to face the teenage boy, he saw sincerity in the other boy's expression. After a moment's thought, he said "alright, I won't leave."

"You're welcome, by the way." Draco whispered. Harry half smiled, and the next thing he knew, Draco was kissing him. For a moment, he forgot himself and kissed Draco back. When he realized what he was doing, he stiffened and pulled away, feeling shocked and slightly violated. His head was reeling from the emotions behind the kiss, and the fact that it was one of the best kisses he had ever recived.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that." Draco said apologeticly, watching Harry for a reaction.

Harry's eyes darted away from Draco, and returned. Turning around, he pulled open the door and fled down the hallway.

Slamming his door behind him, he slid down until he was sitting on the floor, with his back resting against it's solid surface. His breath came in ragged gasps and his mind raced in circles of confusion. He couldn't believe what Draco had just done, and he couldn't believe that his own reaction. He had never thought to kiss a boy before, in fact, he had never even comtemplated looking at them in a sexual manner. Now, he didn't know. That kiss had been wonderful, amazing actually. But had he kissed the boy back because he was lonely, or did he feel some sort of attration towards the teen? He didn't know, he couldn't think straight. What he needed was time alone to think about things and straighten them out.

He spent the next few days avoiding Draco, which wasn't all that hard, since Draco was trying to avoid him, and trying to sort out his thoughts and feelings. He was grateful that school wouldn't be starting again until next September, after everything had been sorted out, because it gave him more time to think. By the end of another week, he thought he knew what he felt, but he needed to see Draco again before he could be sure. He could only hope that Draco had come to the same conclusion about his feelings that Harry had.

Getting up from his perch on the windowsill of his room, he was about to open the door when a knock sounded from the other side. Opening the door curiously, he was surprised to find none other than Draco Malfoy standing there, waiting to be let in. "What are you doing here?" Harry asked.

"I wanted to talk to you about what happened the other day."

"Oh, well, come in then." Harry said, opening the door wider to allow Draco entrance. He stepped back as Draco stepped into the room and closed the door behind him.

"Look, I'm sorry about what I did. I wasn't thinking -"

"Draco-" Harry attempted to cut the other boy off.

"Would you just let me finish?" Draco snapped. "Anyway, I'm really sorry about it, and I would understand it if you hated me now . . . again . . ."

"Goddamnit Draco! I don't hate you!" Harry paused, waiting to see if Draco wanted to say something. When he didn't, Harry continued, although his voice was nearly a whisper. "You don't even have to be sorry about what you did."

Draco stared. "Wha- why?" Harry didn't answer, at least, not out loud. "Harry, what do you mean?"

"Why should you be sorry when I kissed you back?"

"I hadn't thought of that . . ." Instead of answering, Harry shoved Malfoy against the door and kissed him before he lost his nerve. Draco was so shocked that it took him a moment to respond to Harry's actions, but he did, taking the kiss one step further. Harry's lips parted in response to Draco's tongue sliding across his lips, letting Draco explore his mouth. Their last kiss had been simple, no tongue involved, and that one had been amazing. This kiss was electrifying, sending shivers down Harry's spine and setting his blood on fire.

_And all will turn  
To silver glass  
A light on water  
Grey ships pass_

A minute or so later, the two boys broke away from one another, gasping for breath. As Harry looked at Draco, he had a random thought. _I've never kissed someone taller than me before . . ._ and it was true, until now at least, since Draco was two inches taller than Harry, who was 5'6".

"So Malfoy, does this mean-" Harry started to ask.

"Does this mean we're dating, Potter? Is that what you were going to ask?" Harry nodded, feeling his face flush. "If you want it to." Draco replied softly. They looked at eachother for a few moments, before Harry broke the silence.

"So, who gets to play the girl in this relationship?"

"You, of course. You _are_ the shorter one, after all." Draco remarked coolly.

"Hey!" Harry objected, even though he knew it was true.

"Oh come off it, you don't honestly think you're _taller_ than me, do you Potter?" Harry rolled his eyes in response.

"Of course I don't _think_ I'm taller," Harry started, eliciting a smirk from Draco. "I _know_ I'm taller." Draco's smirk dissapeared as Harry finished and he glared.

"You are _not_ taller than me, Potter!"

"A little insecure, are we?" Harry teased.

"No," Draco quipped. "I'm stating the facts."

"So am I." Harry responded.

"And just how do you figure that?"

"Well, if you really want to know -"

Draco narrowed his eyes dangerously.

"- I am taller than you - when you're a ferret!" Draco jumped on Harry, knocking him to the floor and sat on Harry's abdomen, pinning Harry's shoulders down with his hands.

"I'm not a ferret though, now am I?"

"Sometimes you are." Harry remarked. "And a very cute ferret, I might add . . ."

Draco shook his head and got up, moving away from Harry as he sat up, regarding Draco from the floor.

"You're an insufferable git sometimes, you know that?" Draco said.

Harry smirked. "I am fully aware of that, yes. But are _you_ aware that you are also a git -"

"Yes, I know."

"- most of the time?"

"Harry Potter, I'm warning you . . ."

"What are you going to do, bite me?"

"It's a thought."

A few days later, the two teens could be found in the library or in the study, privately mourning their losses. Harry was curled up in a big, overstuffed chair by the fireplace in the library, watching the flames and thinking about Ginny. He also thought about Ron and Hermione, who were still in the hospital, but alive and recovering well, as the letter he had received the previous day indicated. Harry also wondered what his friends would think of his relationship with Malfoy, but that didn't really matter at the moment.

Draco was sitting in the quiet darkness of the study, thinking about Luna and his mother. It had been his mother's murder that had caused him to turn to the Order and help their cause instead of Voldemort's, mostly because his father was the murderer - and it had been Voldemort's orders. He also thought of Harry, and how he had found himself becoming attracted to the boy.

As Harry sat thinking, he was out of his mind by the sound of a door closing. Turning around, he saw Ginny walking towards him. At first he couldn't believe she was alive, but then his mind rejected him, and then he wondered if he had finally snapped and was now seeing things. Ginny stopped in front of him and he realized that he could see the flickering flames of the fire _through_ her. _Maybe she's a ghost,_ he thought.

"I'm not a ghost, Harry." Ginny said, reading his mind. "I'm dead, but I have been granted a few moments here so that I could speak with you." Harry tried to say something, but no sound came out of his open mouth. "I love you Harry. I want you to always remember that. Your parents also send their love, although they could not come here with me." Harry nodded. She reached towards him and ran her fingers through his hair. _Well, she _feels_ solid enough, real enough._ "Trust me Harry, you aren't imagining things. Now, there's one more thing I would like to say. About your relationship with Draco," Harry's eyes widened in shock. "Yes, I know about it." Ginny said in response to his unasked question. "Anyway, I must say that you two make a very fine couple. Now, normally, I wouldn't have approved, simply because I want you for myself, but under the circumstances, with me being dead and all . . ."

"I still love you Ginny," Harry managed to say.

A sad smile graced Ginny's beautiful face for a moment. "I know." She said. "Never forget me."

"I won't, I promise." Harry whispered, a tear tracing a path down his cheek. Ginny gently brushed it away with fading fingertips and gently kissed him before completely dissapearing. Ginny's voice lingered in the air for a moment longer, whispering to his mind "I love you."

At the same time Ginny appeared to Harry, Luna appeared to Draco, saying many of the same things - that she loved him, that his mother sent love as well, and that she approved of his relationship with Harry. Draco told all of this to Harry as soon as he found him, still sitting on the chair in the library. Harry told of his experience to Draco, trying hard not to cry.

For the next few hours, the two teen boys sat together on a couch in the library, comforting each other with silence. As they sat there together, each boy realized that they had fallen in love with the other. Harry turned to Draco to tell him, and found the other boy looking at him. Harry realized that the other teen knew that Harry had fallen for Draco and knew in turn that Draco had fallen for him. So instead of speaking, he kissed Draco Malfoy, his one-time enemy and now his boyfriend.

_Into the west_


End file.
